The Word

Tag: love

  • Word of the Day

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    The genie grants you a wish. What is it?

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    My initial thought was, “I wish I’d win the lottery.” Then, thinking more about that, I wondered how that choice would impact me in other ways than the obvious freedom coming from unlimited cash. Seems like a dream come true, but there’s a whole TV show about how the lottery has ruined people’s lives. I don’t think I’d mismanage the bag, so the opportunities for ruin get very creative in my anxious mind.

    There’s also the fact that wishing for money speaks to a scarcity mindset that I evidently still have, which I’ve been working hard to shed. Just in the last week, I’ve gotten extra groceries and a massive package of paper towels for free due to errors of sorts. If I’m able to summon abundance, why can’t it be a truckload of hundred dollar bills? I suspect it’s that question alone that keeps me from winning big on my numbers–there’s more Higher Self work to be done, and winning the lottery won’t do it for me. Bummer.

    Beyond the lottery, I’d be tempted to wish for a steady writing career. Just a quick wish and then, poof! Instant success. When I overthink that possibility, I get the feeling that I wouldn’t be happy with that one, either. Being plummeted into a lucrative writing career without having earned it would be cheating. It wouldn’t feel fulfilling. I also doubt I’d enjoy it at all. I would be like SpongeBob with those inflatable, fake muscly arms. A true poser.

    So, my first two immediate options are out. I could wish for all of the landscaping in my yard to be perpetually pristine, but maybe wishing for my house to be constantly clean (without me having to do it) is the better bet. But then I wouldn’t get that pride from making my house clean, and my kid wouldn’t grow up with those values instilled, so the cleaning one is out. And there’s some true happiness to be harvested in a flower bed, so landscaping is also off the wish list. 

    It’s starting to look like hard work and experiencing authentic achievement is worth at least a lottery’s worth of money. 

    Maybe we scale it down a bit. A lifetime supply of free Dairy Queen? No, I don’t need that temptation in my face all the time. I have no self control over ice cream. What about having my pre-baby body back? If you’ve been paying attention, you already know that’s a trick question. I need my hard work and authentic achievement! Call me a glutton for punishment, but I love a hard workout, and no genie will take that grueling journey away from me. I could get really specific with it and wish that I could eat all the DQ, brownies, frosting, cinnamon rolls, and donuts I want without ever having a physical consequence…but that seems like a really dumb wish when I sit with that choice.

    So far I’ve ruled out having endless desserts, money, attractiveness, and success as my wishes. Oh, and a forever-clean house and nice landscaping without the back pain. At this point you may be asking yourself if I’m crazy, and my response would be “define crazy.” If having defense mechanisms so high it wards off White Walkers is crazy, then perhaps that’s me–but I also think I’m making a smart choice.

    Being granted a wish is having true power. What kind of person would I be if I had absolute control for a moment and I spent it on myself? A big part of me still wants to keep it about me by wishing for perfect health and happiness for my family, specifically my daughter. As a mom, I naturally never want her to experience any kind of pain or illness. Speaking of natural, though, that’s life–she and I will have to endure those difficult moments when they cross our paths. That’s part of the cruel beauty of this human experience. The pain and pressure turn us into the rare diamonds we are, and my family can’t be exempt from that.

    Finally, I think I’ve arrived at my wish. It boils down to something we’ve all heard before, so much so that it was written as a joke in Miss Congeniality: I want world peace. 

    This is unattainable in our current timeline, so wishing for “world peace” without being hyper-specific would be a mistake. My version of it would be: I wish for the ungodly billionaires and trillionaires in our world to have their Christmas Carol moment and change their greed into generosity by donating just 40 percent of their collective estates to eradicating world hunger, disease, for-profit healthcare, and protecting not only the populace but the Earth herself by ending wars, capping or redirecting investment into technology so that Earth’s resources are not only preserved but replenished, and apply that funding towards elevating our society into a higher frequency where we will all feel safe, secure, and loved, where competition amongst ourselves is non-existent, and where we all rediscover the sanctity of community because of the realization during this transition that We Are All One. 

    That genie probably wishes I’d gone with winning the lottery.

     

  • Word of the Day

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    What’s one thing you wish you had started doing earlier in life?

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    This question feels like What’s Your Biggest Regret’s nosy neighbor, and that’s too close for comfort for me. Regret is weird, right? If I went back and changed a bunch of things, I wouldn’t be living this life that I love. 

    That’s not to say it would be a worse life, or even a better one. I think there’s some version of me in the multiverse that stuck to writing earlier on in life and made it big. One of many reasons I didn’t do that is because I was afraid my passion would turn into something I’d hate when it became a job. Was the cure for that completely hanging it up for the better part of 2 decades to go work as a cog in the corporate machine? No, probably not. But, I’m here now, writing what I want; I’m working that muscle out again on my own terms. And for that reason, I’m thankful. (Insert Shark Tank meme.)

    I did have a goal when I was in my very early 20’s to have my first book published by the time I turned 23. That turned into 28, which turned into “30’s,” and eventually it fell off my radar. The feeling of guilt I have for not honoring my goal is something that has stuck with me. However, on my healing journey, I can recognize that each moment propagates a new me. The Me back then didn’t know any better, and I can be proud of where Now Me is at. I can give myself room to understand that I was only working with the tools I had available to me back then, and I work to forgive the version of myself who’s judging her from afar. 

    At 35, I’ve learned so much about myself that it’s completely understandable why I didn’t start writing consistently and in a disciplined manner when I was 20. I could spend all day glamorizing that path, but ultimately it doesn’t feel right anymore. It’s not what happened for me, and I’m at peace with that. I could say the same thing for other habits that I’ve started fine-tuning just recently–I wish I started eating better sooner, working out consistently earlier in life, learned to go easier on myself when I was younger. But how could I have done any of those things, when I didn’t have that knowledge any earlier than I did? 

    What I’ve gathered at this point is that life is a classroom. There are lessons handed to us every day. We’re in the clinical trials as we’re learning. We’re bound to stumble and get the answers wrong sometimes when we’re learning as we go. There’s no sense in looking back on Day 1, Lesson 1 and being mad at ourselves for not passing Day 30, Lesson 30’s test. I appreciate my learning process more each day, and it’s part of what makes life beautiful; it’s never too early to see how lovely life really is.

  • Word of the Day

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    Daily writing prompt
    What’s the best advice you’d give to someone younger than you?
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    Man, I wish this prompt was more specific. I was just thinking earlier today, “I would do well (and have fun) writing an advice column!”

    (Does anyone need advice on an oddly specific circumstance? Send me a message!)

    In the meantime, let’s see what advice I can cook up for this vast population landscape…

    My Advice for Someone Younger than Me: It’s pretty cliche, but it boils down to “don’t take yourself too seriously.”

    While I stand by that, part of me wants to point out that I’m very excited by where I am currently in my life, and I wouldn’t be here now if I didn’t take myself entirely too seriously in my younger years. I’m just now learning, at 35, how to be more fluidly goofy. I hope that by the time my daughter turns 2, I know how to be a silly goose–but I’ve always been old for my age, and it’s hard for me to comprehend not being serious.

    There’s a lot to unpack for someone who takes life too seriously. It’s not like it’s wrong, or bad, or you’re off to a bad start if you’re intense, focused, results-driven, or–dare I say–deeply anxious. For me, it was (and is) a fear-driven response to me needing control, mainly over my future. If I got good grades, pitched perfect innings, nailed my job interviews, got timely promotions, and was liked well enough through all those stages, I would have checked off all the boxes to achieve The Happy Life that I Should Have By Now, right?

    Wrong! Now, I wasn’t living a bad life, but I was wedged so far under my own thumb that I couldn’t breathe. If I made one mistake, I would have a meltdown (of which there were many!). Over time, I had somehow created this sense of self-worth that only maintained my own uncompromising standards as long as I never screwed anything up. Which, spoiler alert, is impossible to do! Imagine being in your 20s–no, any age!–and not screwing anything up. It’s literally laughable now that I’m so far removed from that era of my life–which makes it a pretty sad reality for me when I look back. I did not have to be so hard on myself, and I’m actively working on healing that part of me to this day.

    If you’re someone younger than me who is taking life seriously, I salute you for your grit and determination. There is nothing wrong with you. You’re doing what makes you feel safe. Might I suggest that you take some dedicated time to dance, alone in your garage, where nobody can see how silly you might look? Or go to an open mic night at a comedy club and tell a story? Maybe instead you’d enjoy parking your car and walking, with too-heavy comforters and a backpack full of snacks, down to a secluded beach with your friend for a sandy outdoor sleepover? (That may have only worked because it was in 2009 and before the Age of Surveillance…).

    All this to say, my advice is to keep up with your responsibilities, but add this to your list: “Do something silly, and love myself through it.” If you must work, work on feeling whole, even when you are perceived to come up short. If you must achieve, be the best at forgiving yourself for your missteps. If you must focus, zero in on how great you’re doing at any given point. And if you must be perfect, know with 100% certainty that you already are–not despite, but because of your imperfections.

  • Word of the Day

    Daily writing prompt
    What is the meaning of life?
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    Bold prompt! I’ll take a shot at it. I didn’t name my blog The Word for nothing.

    It’s interesting–being asked this question a decade ago was almost rhetorical, in that nobody had an answer and accepted it that way. I think some of us today have finally figured it out. Maybe. It’s all relative, of course.

    My belief is that the meaning of life on Earth is to fully experience being human. The human experience, meaning: Learning, growing, loving, hurting, healing, and doing it all through appreciative eyes. To live means to see the world for all its color, both bright and dark. Eventually one lives to learn that the whole color palette exists for enrichment; gray, black, bleak, and dreary do the same thing for us as the pinks, yellows, sunsets, and rainbows.

    I like the phrase “we’re all made of stardust.” I think that we’re essentially all One. We all come from the same consciousness. One of my favorite comedians/people in the public spotlight, Pete Holmes, does a cute bit in his everyday life where he refers to those he interacts with as “other me’s.” For example, he could be checking out at the grocery store and think of the cashier, “That Me is being super efficient today!” I love that exercise. It makes the Golden Rule make a lot more sense.

    I subscribe to the notion that in this life, the higher power is within us. Call it God(s), Universe, Love & Light, whatever name we want to use, but we come from “that” and return to that when our lives here come to an end. I call it Source. This gives me great comfort in understanding the meaning of life and “death”; the fact is, energy never dies. It only transforms. Everything here on Earth is made of energy. Our bodies, our minds; we’re 100% energetic beings. We don’t die, we transcend. We’re here to Live, Laugh, Love, cry, build, learn, choose, survive, experience, feel, hurt, grow, heal…I could go on forever. How lucky we are that we were given the opportunity to come to Earth and be human.

    I believe Source is probably Heaven–no pain, all love. We were all a bunch of energetic mish-mash in some light-filled bliss arena, waiting for our calling card to Earth. The concept of Heaven/Source is hard for us to understand after a while of being human. We forget about the value of our energy and consciousness once we’re conditioned enough. But, today in 2026, we’re waking up to the fact that our energy and frequencies are lucrative currency. The level at which you radiate energy attracts the same level back to you–low frequency attracts more low, high brings more high.

    Finding gratitude is the first step to raising your frequency; high vibrations lead you to the meaning of life. The part of your brain that lights up when anxious is the same part that lights up when you’re practicing gratitude. Therefore, they can’t be used at the same time–you can’t be anxious while you’re being actively grateful. Try this, and soon, you’ll be in awe at the richness of the color green of the grass and trees; wondering who first told you dandelions were a nuisance when they add so much color to the world; feeling your cells drink in vitamin D from the sunlight on your skin; thanking your lungs for the favor of fresh air. All that and more just from existing, and there’s still all that you have in your possession to be thankful for. It’s stunningly beautiful, this life on Earth.

    I feel my heart bursting with love and gratitude for my life every day. It didn’t happen overnight; I lived on autopilot for a long time, feeling stuck and unhappy and suffering internally. My story, if it ever gets told, needs its own post because it doesn’t fit in here. It boils down to this: I had a baby, quit my job, felt scared about it, and subsequently started a gratitude journal. I wrote down anywhere from five to twenty things I was grateful for every day, building up those new neural pathways. Doing this really did help me in my spiritual awakening (and ongoing journey). My mind now looks for things out of love instead of fear. I feel more at peace than I ever have before, and I’m so thankful that my daughter gets this version of me.

    I think that the goal in life, for everyone, regardless of circumstances, is to name those five to twenty things to be grateful for everyday. It’s finding that beauty, that excitement for living; it’s listening to your body, your higher self/inner voice/intuition, even though it can be scary. That’s what I think the meaning of life is: Knowing that no matter the path you take, the scene around you will always mirror the scene within you, and the opportunity is there to make it like Heaven on Earth.

  • Word of the Day

    Daily writing prompt
    How do you plan the perfect road trip?
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    This time, I’m making the writing prompt into a story.

    The Road I was Made to Travel

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    “If you wait until the last minute, it only takes a minute.” These words echoed in my mind on repeat. Beads of sweat gathered on my brow and my heart raced as I tried to remember where my suitcase was.

    I didn’t put myself in this position. My boss did. If it weren’t for him, I’d be able to stay in town and keep making a lukewarm salary bookkeeping for his mid-sized company. Instead, I’m packing up my life into my mid-sized luggage to get away from him.

    The truth is, I did put myself here. It was my choice to take the bet–name the winner of this year’s PGA Championship. I’d picked Rory McIlroy because his name was the only one I knew, given that he won the Masters for the second time a couple months ago. Apparently that was the wrong name to say and now I’ve lost my comfort in life.

    The wager wasn’t about money for him. He needed a new deck. I stupidly told him I would build him said deck if McIlroy lost this weekend. He said he would give me a $20k bonus if he won. This guy, he’s such a prick. He makes more cash in an hour than I do in a week, and that’s 100% under his control. So yeah, I took the bet. Choose the new It Guy in golf, probably win a lucrative bet; lose and get exposed as a deck fraud, have a good laugh. Seemed like an easy decision at the time.

    It wouldn’t have been such a big deal if this boss of mine knew how to take a joke. Sure, he can laugh mighty loud as long as he’s at the winning end of it–but I set myself up really poorly here. Not only is his sense of humor questionable, but he’s one of those people who makes you follow through on your word. “You’ll build me a deck if Rory loses?” he’d asked. “I sure will!” I’d answered. Obviously that was a lie! Do I look like a deck builder? He should’ve known better. I have a beer belly the shape of a large desk globe and I pant after walking up the single flight of stairs to the office. I couldn’t build a deck with Legos.

    Being the jerk he is, he just has to see the best in people, so he believed me when I said I’d do it as long as he’d fork over that twenty grand when Rory won. This Rory guy really screwed me. Who is he, anyway? He should know he lost me my apartment, job, friendships, and lifestyle simply from not showing up to win this tournament. How hard could it be? Just win it, buddy! My life is in your hands!

    Since no one gave him the message, and since my boss insists on having integrity, I’m packing up my most treasured belongings and hitting the road. I refuse to face the music that I didn’t start playing. It’s the deck’s fault that it needs to be repaired, anyway. I can’t believe it started falling apart and needed to be fixed up for him. Thanks to Rory, Boss, and Deck, I have a road trip ahead of me that wasn’t planned at all.

    In a half hour, I was able to get my car packed. I only had a few things worth taking, anyway. I got a playlist of about 15 songs ready, three snack baggies of Doritos, and my cat in his carrier settled on the passenger seat. My boss planned on cashing in on his deck before tomorrow’s morning meeting, and I’ll be damned if I show my face on that zoom call. I can only cross my fingers that I have enough with me to last this life transformation.

    My car felt uncomfortable. I didn’t put any gas in it when I had the chance yesterday. I could tell my cat was getting restless since I hadn’t fed him yet that evening. Road trips are supposed to be fun and whimsical, so I bet on myself and my spontaneity; this was one bet I was sure to win, as long as my car, cat, and landlord don’t create any problems. If anything goes wrong on this trek, I know who to blame.